Toddlers who repeatedly offer a toy to an adult only to pull it back are engaging in normal social experimentation as they learn how to share. While this behavior can resemble teasing or possessiveness, psychological research indicates that sharing is a complex skill developing across the second and third years of life. By offering and reclaiming an item, a young child is often inviting interaction, observing the adult's reaction, and navigating the desire to involve others while maintaining control over their pos…
Key points
Repeatedly offering and retracting toys is a normal form of social experimentation rather…: Repeatedly offering and retracting toys is a normal form of social experimentation rather than deliberate teasing or manipulation.
Children must firmly comprehend ownership boundaries before they can comfortably share th…: Children must firmly comprehend ownership boundaries before they can comfortably share their personal possessions with others.
Assisting someone with a task emerges earlier in infant development than the ability to g…: Assisting someone with a task emerges earlier in infant development than the ability to give up valued items.
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A toddler picks up a favourite toy, walks towards a parent and proudly holds it out. Just as the parent reaches for it, the child pulls it away, hugs it close or starts playing with it again. A few moments later, the same thing happens. The child offers the toy, waits for a reaction and then takes it back.
For adults, this can look like teasing, possessiveness or a child who wants attention without actually sharing. But this seemingly confusing behaviour may offer a glimpse into how toddlers are beginning to understand one of the more complicated social skills: sharing.
8 Oct 2026 | 14:25
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At this age, sharing is not simply about handing something over. It involves understanding that another person may want an object, recognising that the object belongs to someone and gradually learning that giving something away does not necessarily mean losing it forever.
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Research suggests that the ability to share develops gradually during the…
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